WHO has to deal with the consequences of these choices? ME. so mind your own.

amy emailed me back and asked if i wanted to have an in-person meeting or if a phone conversation about what i'll all need to live in boston was okay because that's what she had planned. i don't really see any reason why i should have an in-person meeting to discuss this that can't be discussed over the phone.. not right away anyway- so i said a phone conversation during my ics meeting tomorrow seemed alright to me. i mentioned my frustration with how ics gave the people at the boston housing business the impression that i needed more assistance than i ACTUALLY do (they probably assume it's better to have more help than not enough help). however- it's not fair because it impedes on my independence and more than likely privacy because i've ALREADY had 24 hour pca assistance when i lived in minneapolis and some of the time in burnsville (i think most of the time). fredrick's hours got cut down to only five hours a day with me now- i don't wanna be forced to go back in my progress just because it's more convenient for other people to ignore everything i've already been through and make money off of "helping" me when i don't even really need that much help. for instance- i'm sure boston or massachusetts in general has a similar system to what i use now for emergencies (my health alert necklace that i press if i need help in emergencies). plus- whenever i fall, i always manage to make sure (as much as i can) to avoid hitting my head and finding a way to get back up on my own. i don't honestly remember the last time i had to press the button. i'll never get outta this state and live MY own damn life if people keep advertently ignoring what I'VE ALREADY done in my life just for the convenience of people who don't have to deal with all the consequences of the choices being made. by taking away my choices and independence will NOT make going back to a state based on assistance look anymore damn appealing to me- it'll more than likely irritate me more and i'll make people sorry that they didn't help me move OUT of this state. i'm AWARE of what i'm getting myself into and the fact that you assume i'm not irritates the fuck outta me. i'm NOT YOU. i am my own person who has obviously experienced more than you if you're gonna make these stupid ignorant assumptions about me. don't assume you'll scare me either. i'm not as naive as you or my mom.
i'm pretty sure i discovered how the person who stole money from me got access to my lockbox. i used to have TWO copies of my lockbox keys on my lanyard and no one has given me problems about this before because i've had them both on my lanyard ever since i lived in burnsville i think. i asked douglas if he knew where the other copy of the lockbox keys were and he said, "no you know where they are. i need to go to sleep, i have work at 4." i don't "know where they are" because if i did- i wouldn't be asking him. so there's another suspect. it disgusts me to see people think they can steal from a person- who is disabled and basically unemployed when the thief more than likely is employed and not disabled. i do EVERYTHING i can to help other people when they need help. i end up getting stole from. whatever. they'll get theirs.